So there are a lot of things about living in the suburbs that have been an adjustment to say the least. There are a lot of things that I will probably just never come to terms with. The biggest being the animals- squirrels, bugs and skunks.

Tuesday morning was like any other morning in our house. Everyone was ready to leave. Cate and Glenn had left for their morning coffee run and Brady and I were working on getting his shoes on. If you know anything about three year olds, this is long task that is usually met with resistance or “I do it”.  We walked out to our garage and I noticed an odor. Not horrible but an odor…burnt rubber, hair on fire, something that I was not used to smelling.

I looked outside as my garage door opened and didn’t see anything unusual.  We walked over to the car to the passenger side. I noticed that the yard waste bag had tipped over. I didn’t think a whole lot about itDid I bump it getting out yesterday? I placed my bags in the passenger seat.  I went to pick up the full yard waste bag before putting Brady in his car seat. The bag started moving.  I screamed out of shock and fear. I jumped in the passenger seat with Brady trying to quickly shut the door.

A day late and a dollar short.

I called Glenn frantically. Not knowing what to do. Do I try to pull out? What if I run something over? Am I shaking too much to drive? What is it? No answer from Glenn. Try again. No answer. Next up. Call the mama. She’s in the car. She can’t talk either.

So, I decide as the smell is getting worse to back the car out of the garage. I back it out quickly, hoping not to hear a noise- a crunch, scream or yelp.  I get it out on the driveway and realize that my three year old is the only thing making a noise and he is sobbing. Not just sobbing but shaking. The kid is just scared.  

I watch as the brown yard waste bag starts moving again. It’s going to tip over. Whatever is in it is going to come out. And it falls on its side. And as it does, the biggest, fattest, ugliest skunk saunters out of the bag. It walks slowly to our neighbor’s yard and disappears.

Brady, did you see the skunk? I think to ask him to try to make it a science lesson but there is nothing but pure fear in his eyes.

I won’t give the gory details of buying baking soda and taking my car to the car wash. Or that I took Brady to daycare only to get a call an hour later saying he smelled so bad that he needs to be picked up and bathed. Or that I had to take a second shower. Or that or mudroom is slowly starting to reek of skunk. Or that my husband spent hours scrubbing our garage. What I will tell you is that I have been skunked.

Skunk in the Suburbs 1 Kristi 0

PS- You’re welcome for the good laugh I just gave each of you.